qtgirl

Well, it seems that the place I am at on this crazy journey to change and weight loss is finding the balance between self-love and self-discipline.

BUT WE WANT IT SO BAD. TO BE THIN! WE ALL TRY SO HARD! Every single one of us on buddyslim tries really hard, maybe not every day or month but often and for long stretches.

And then, we fall sometimes, and we beat ourselves up (I know you do it too). We missed a workout, ate a piece of chocolate, went over our calories and BAM! No gold star today.

But, what about all the good choices we made today, or yesterday.

On the other hand, sometimes we are a bit too generous to ourselves for TOO long and we slip and “fall of the bandwagon”.

AND SO, (sorry for the long post) but I think it is all about balance. Counting our successes but also looking to where we can still improve. Pushing ourselves, but giving ourselves a high five sometimes, a hug, a “great job ME!”

No one can do this for us, it is our own journey to take. But in the end, we need to be our own cheerleader, motivational speaker, care giver and coach to succeed. And WE CAN DO IT! Just find that balance.

I’ll let you know when I get there.

Well, it’s still morning here where I live, not sure about you. But, what are you going to get DONE today?

I’ve found that if you don’t PLAN, it doesn’t happen.

How often does it go from “I’ll do it later” to….”opps, it’s 11 pm and I didn’t get that done today!”

NOT TODAY. Today we are going to make a plan, what do we want to get done (even if it is “nothing”, you can plan your relaxation to make sure that is good too)!

For me, today involves eating well (I’ve got my meals planned and the times I’ll have them)
Exercise: 1 hour of Cardio at 3pm
Work: Planning my lessons for work (I’m a college instructor).

And, tonight for fun (yep, big night out for this girl) a bit of scrap booking. It’s too darn cold to go out (-16 C right now)!

That’s me, that’s my day. Tell me about yours!

Well, I’m almost 3 months into my latest (this) journey to lose weight.
Things have gone well overall, but could be better (is that true of life too?)

Here is what I’ve “learned” so far:

1) It’s tough. This takes work and a lot of it. There is not “secret” or magic way to lose weight.

2) It’s all about the planning baby. If you don’t have the good food in they house. If you don’t bring the healthy snacks to work. If you don’t have a good snack or plan when you go out, it is so easy to “just this once” have a little something. If you’re not careful, those “just this once” can really add up and cause you to fail.

3) It’s about moderation, but even that can be tricky. I’m not “dieting”. I’m trying to start a new way of eating and relationship with food. I’ve been having chocolate from time to time and losing weight. I have a small square (not a huge snickers or something). One square, 40-60 calories. But still, even that can become a “habit”. So now, I have to find the balance between NOT restricting (leading to a binge) and not having this “treat” every day. Ahh..so much to learn.

4) Counting calories helps (at least in the beginning). It’s tiring and annoying, but it is the only real way to keep a track and make sure you are not going over. I know that one day, I won’t have to do this, but for now, it really is helping. The days when I have not done this, I often undereat (surprisingly) which is bad too!

5) Exercise is key. This is a tough pill for many of us to swallow, but it is true. Before I started seriously exercising (thanks Michelle) I was doing okay, but not great. Plus I get to eat more (than 1200 that I was doing before exercise).

6) BUDDYSLIM ROCKS! This site makes all the difference, if you use it, it you put the effort in. When I was doing my best I was on here a few times a day. This past week it’s been less, and I notice the difference.

I don’t have it all figured out, far from it, but I know that will all you wonderful buddies out there helping me, I CAN DO THIS, I WILL DO THIS, I AM DOING THIS!

Well, it is Tuesday, and a bit of a weird time for new week pledges, but yesterday was a holiday so today feels like the start of a new week.

This week,
I am going to do all my workouts!
I’m going to eat more raw fruit and veggies (than I already do).
I’m going to have some protein smoothies a few times.
I’m going to write two chapters in my books by Friday!

I’m going to be awesome!

I’ll tell you all about my success on the weekend!

We got to bed late (2 am). That is a bit later than normal even for us, but not incredibly.

I woke up, sometime this morning and could not get back to sleep. After lying their for ages, I put on my glasses and checked the time. 6:35 am.

I decided to keep trying and stayed in bed.

Next time I looked 8 am. So I got up and started doing stuff (all the stuff I’d been thinking about keeping me awake).

Sigh! With 4 hours sleep (I’m guessing, it might be less), I’m wondering how this is going to wreak my day.
I’m supposed to go to a birthday party today and now I just want to stay home and sleep and chill.

And I’m worried when I get home, I’ll be too tired to workout! BOO!

Sorry, I’m quite the whiny baby when I don’t get enough sleep. I’m seriously going to have to consider the baby thing because I know they don’t let you sleep for months!

Hope the rest of you are feeling more rested and alert.

Going to try and have a nap now!

The thing I want more than to be thin, is to no longer be overweight. The same thing you say? I don’t think so.

I want to stop having that reason to put myself down.
I want to stop having a excuse for not achieving my dreams (i.e. if I was thin I could do that).
I want to stop feeling insecure in social situations.
I want to feel good when I go shopping, not sad or upset.
I want to be fit and healthy and able to run for the bus without dying for breath.

Don’t get me wrong, I know a lot of this happens on the inside and I do a pretty good job from day to day. I don’t HATE myself, I don’t beat myself up too often. But it does creep up once in awhile.

I want to lose the shame that has come with being overweight my whole adult life. People should not judge others, and I wish they didn’t, but I am tired of being judged or looked down on because I am overweight.

I’m so tired of this very heavy emotional load that carrying weight and food “issues” has. I’m ready to let this go. I’m ready for a new start!

I know that when I lose the weight my life won’t be perfect. I know that I will still have bad days, problems and things to deal with.

I’m okay with that.

I just want NEW things to deal with, and I want my “weight” to not be one of them anymore.

I KNOW that I will have to “manage” my weight for the rest of my life. I have accepted that now…finally. But I just want to get to a place where it no longer consumes my every thought. I guess for me, I hope being thinner means, being normal!

I’ll let you know what it’s like when I get there!

I joined a diet group in December for some motivation and accountability.

The group was designed that part of the money from people joining was put into a “pot” and the prize goes to the “biggest loser” I guess, or the person who lost the most weight in the 3 months.

The leader kept letting people join and just said, they would have less time to lose the weight for the competition.

I was doing really well. I kind of know how the other group members were doing so I know that I was most likely going to win or at least get 2nd or 3rd. I’d lost the most, but it was based on % of body weight so some people smaller than me could lose less and still win.

Next week was supposed to be the big weigh-in. I lost 4 lbs this week and was really geared up to work hard this week and WIN!

AND THEN!!!!

She says she’s extending the group for 9 more weeks so people who just joined have more time to lose. This is so unfair. I was so mad. She said, “most of you just started, so otherwise, who would win?” and I said “ME!” and she said, “Oh, yeah, I guess you’re right!”.

I talked to her afterwards and she just made all these lame excuses and just backtracked on her word.

I’m so angry. All she runs this group for is a scam to sell herbalife products, she does not actually honour the original commitment or deal made.

BUT THE PLUS SIDE IS….

When I joined that group, I came home inspired and joined buddyslim and although the group itself has been of little help (aside from accountability of weigh-in’s), I am losing weight and it seems joining the group gave me the push I needed to make some real changes.

And I’m just going to have to let it go and focus on the fact that I have already WON, because I’m 14 lbs closer to where I want to be, a slimmer, healthier me!

And there is the happy ending! I’ll let you know if I “win” in 9 weeks!

I’m glad I got my butt kicked yesterday. Today at weigh-in I am down 2.2lbs!
I’m glad I didn’t give up last week when I felt so discouraged.

So, for those buddies out there on a plateau. Just hang on. Don’t give up, don’t worry too much, don’t eat a whole chocolate cake out of anger and frustration. Just keep doing what you need to do (eat right, exercise, water) and the weight loss will come!

WE CAN DO IT! WE WILL DO IT!

I have to work out today. It’s only 5pm, so I still have time, but I have to get going.

Why am I hesitating. I have been waking up with a “cold” every morning, but then feel fine in an hour.

I’m okay now, I can work out.

So please buddies, help me out here. Give me some encouraging (or threatening ) words to get me to do my workout.

HELP BUDDIES!

Well some of you may have seen my meltdown post on Saturday (my weigh in day) called Crash and Burn. Thanks to all of you who supported and commented.

I’ve held on. I did not let that push me over the edge, run to binge, etc. I kept working out, eating right and holding on.

It’s me vs. the weight in this match and I’M GOING TO WIN!!!!!

Having a good week so far. Woke up with a bit of a cold and now I have monster cramps (PMS, but I’m on my period, so it MS I guess). I try to avoid meds when I can so had a camomile tea, but the cramps are coming back.

Still have to get the energy to do my workout today. I’ve been dizzy the last two workouts so have decided to do one, but a bit lighter, not trying to kill myself here (hear that Michelle, you may have tried to kill me with that workout plan, but I won’t die….just kidding!)

And so, just thought I’d check in, say HI to my buddies and hope you all have a good week. Let’s hope that this Saturday is a bit less dramatic than last Saturday.