qtgirl

Yesterday didn’t got so well, and I am a bit disappointed.

We got up early to take our cat to the vet, but we’ve been having problems with our new vet (charging us obscene rates) so we went all the way across town to our old vet from before we moved (2 hour subway and bus journey). I went because my husband, bless him, is not great at doing the “talking” to the vet and asking all the questions. I had to work in the evening downtown so stayed down there for the rest of the day and did some x-mas shopping. Problem is, this vet trip was unplanned and we just rushed out of the house so I had not brought too much healthy food with me. I did have a protein bar and some risotto and cottage cheese to eat later at work.

By about 4 pm I was ravenous but could not really see many “healthy” options in the mall I was in. Just before I started work I grabbed a chicken salad sandwich at a Tim Horton’s (don’t think that was the best choice…but oh well). And then did my shift.

I walked into work and of course it is food mania. Boxes of choclates, fresh baked goods, M&M’s, etc. These things are so hard to avoid, especially when you are still hungry and tired, etc. So, I had a number of treats.

Part of me felt so disappointed in myself, I mean, could I not just ‘resist’. I ate my cottage cheese (that was a bit off from being in my backpack all day) and I just wanted cookies!

It seems that my diet works really well while I’m at home, in the safe cocoon I’ve built with no unhealthy foods in site except my chocolate advent calendar which I allow 1 piece a day. (20 cals).

So now, today I have to work again and I am dreading it, I know there will be more treats and sweets and I just know that the little button that says “don’t” seems to not work!  I’m hoping that if I am “prepared” and have enough healthy snacks, that I won’t indulge in the sweets.

 Well, fingers crossed!   Thanks for listening.

Well, I’ve been doing really good since I joined this website (Dec 2nd) and started my new healthy eating plan/life.

Things have been going well, I’ve counted almost every calorie, stayed in my range, exercised, etc. And yet, the scale was not moving.

I have been trying to break past 180 for so long now. 179, that’s all I want to see…come on!

I can’t say I haven’t been frustrated. But I’ve just kept going.

And then, this morning, it happened. 179. I was so excited I wanted to call my mom and share the news (but I knew she would be sleeping).

Now, even if it goes back up tomorrow I feel like it really is possible to lose. For so long it’s felt like all my efforts are in vain.

I keep saying that this time feels different. I’m a veteran at losing weight, but something has clicked for me. It’s as if all these years I’ve been collecting puzzle pieces of what I need to do to lose weight that will work FOR ME. And now, finally, those pieces are clicking into place.

Thank you to all of you who have supported me on the beginning of my journey over the past week or so. And more to come.

And to those of you who are in the same place I was, hold on…it will come.

Well, I’m back…so that is something right?

Day 2. Yesterday went well, I didn’t exercise, but I ate well. I did notice that I had not eaten enough in the morning and was really hungry in the evening, but still came in at the right calories, so whew!

This morning I got up early and did groceries. I bought tons of great healthy food…not one unhealthy thing entered my cart.
So, after a good breakfast here I am.

My big fear is this Saturday, I have a Christmas party at a friends. Last time I was there (and dieting) I really over-indulged. I felt like a unhealthy food vacuum. I have to somehow plan and make sure I will do well. I know there will be a veggie tray and stuff, but celery looks so unappealing next to chocolate brownies. And I’m planning to not drink any booze, which will make playing the crazy games she has a bit more scary.

Any thoughts? Any mental notes to get me through this party unscathed?

I really want to reach my goals and do well and overcome this unhealthy bond I have with certain foods. How can I reach the point where chocolate brownies or cookies or whatever don’t make me salivate like a puppy?

Sigh! Well, I’m going to focus on today and tomorrow and worry about Saturday later.

Today I’m going to keep eating healthy, count my calories and portion sizes and do a workout!

Well, my tummy is feeling better and I have had some good healthy meals so far today. Off to a good start. I am still planning to exercise later this afternoon, but need to do a bit of work first (marking). Thanks for the encouragement I have had so far, that is really great!

Well, this is my first blog. Also, this is my first day of a new lifestyle, health plan.

Yesterday I joined a group for a 12 week plan to lose weight. They did not give tons of guidance yet per say, but I joined so I would feel accountable.

I’ve tried many things over the years to lose weight and can’t say that I don’t feel discouraged. On the other hand, I feel that I can overcome my lifetime battle with weight.

So of course, this morning I feel sick (not sure why). I’ve feel sick to my stomach since last night (was it the “diet tea” they gave us to try?). So, I have not eaten yet. I’m planning to have half a slice of dry toast when I feel I can eat without puking. I know that I need to eat to lose weight and this is not the best start, but all I can envision eating today is soup and dry bread. I hope I feel better later.

I was also supposed to exercise today. And feel discouraged that I feel sick and not sure I can do it. Well, it is still early here so hopefully in the afternoon I will feel better and be able to work on my goals.

That’s it for now. I guess I will post more later. I don’t really know how this works, or what to do, but we’ll see.